I'm Here For Anyone Who Needs It...

[Lstname89]

I took a leave of absence from the board for a while after a lot of drama in my personal life. Two of my family members lost their battles with cancer this year and amongst other issues I had, I attempted to take my own life to relieve the pain.

I spent weeks in therapy working on a lot of issues and problems. It's actually kind of funny (in a crude way), a double major in psychology/education and there I was on the couch, unconscious because of all the pills I ingested. I knew better, but the pain became unbearable for me. I wanted it to end, I wanted relief.

I won't make this post a novel, but I just want to let everyone know that you all serve a purpose, and if you don't think so and feel like you can't handle your problems anymore, I'm here to talk. I find that I can be most candid and open around strangers aka: my psychiatrist. Although I have no credentials, i do have experience in dealing with a heavy burden of depression and suicidal thoughts.

I'm begging you, if you're feeling blue, please reach out to this thread. I'll do my best to keep up with it.

Best regards,

Anthony

 

[bribarham]

We all care about you. I will keep you in my prayers to request healing in your life. God Bless you!

 

[Lstname89]

We all care about you. I will keep you in my prayers to request healing in your life. God Bless you!

That's super kind of you. Although I'm not a religious person, I can appreciate your kind words and prayers.

Right now, I'm just looking to help others that might be in need of help. I've actually started a mentoring group at my college where we visit high schools and speak to LGBT folks who are in need of guidance and some positive influences. If I can change the mind of even one troubled teen that their life is worth living, then my life is worth continuing.

 

[Kizmet311]

Anthony, I don't have anything to share myself, but I am very sorry that you have had such a rough time. I can't even begin to imagine the pain you must have been feeling. I am glad that you are starting to come through it and I hope that you will continue forward on your journey to healing. Do always remember your worth and hopefully we can all remember that these strangers we talk to online are actual people with real feelings and real issues and we can all be more considerate of each other in our discussions.

I have lost 3 aunts (all my mother's sisters) to breast cancer since 2003 and those kind of losses can certainly take a toll on a family and one's outlook on life. I don't know if I hide pain well or just don't feel it as deeply as others (not to say I don't care or grieve, I just seem to cope better than others I think), but when I stop and think about the loss of family over the last 16 years, it is a lot. The three aunts I mentioned, both my grandparents (my mom's parents) passed in 2000 (my dad's parents passed long before I was born), and I lost my father in 2014. I experienced 3 miscarriages (a taboo topic that few talk about openly) before I finally had my daughter, who was then born with a Congenital Heart Defect and had to have surgery at 3 weeks old. I myself was born with a different CHD and had surgery at 1 year old (it was 1980 and it took them a lot longer to figure out what was wrong and why I wasn't growing). Life can certainly deal us some difficult situations, but we just have to try to push through to the other side. The pain/fear is never completely gone and it will always affect us (I am a particularly anxious person who worries a lot), but hopefully we can all find reasons to get up and live our lives to the fullest extent possible.

I know you said you aren't a religious person, but I will keep you in my prayers as well and I will use your situation to remind me to always be kind to people (even strangers in an online forum), because we never know what they are going through.

 

[Ann055]

Anthony, just know that I am always here for you. I don't post much but I'm always around. You've helped me on this Board and I will never forget it. Am so sorry for your pain but am very happy you are working through it. Always have you in my thoughts and prayers.

 

[opry051008]

Anthony, LIFE is precious. I'm thankful that you've found your way back, and a new purpose.

 

[Angel8675]

I know these are some older posts, however, it was the first time I have seen them. I think there is a lot of importance in these posts. Depression is one heck of a disease.

 

[Renegade Runaway]

This thread may be old, like Angel said, but I gotta say something too.

First of all, thanks for sharing your story and doing what you do! Just one single kind word can give a person more hope than most people can imagine.

Also, we all need to accept and understand that mental health is an illness too and not just some "made-up thing" like so many think. The stigma is still massive and that has to change. Thanks to everyone who's working to change that!