Depressed..Hate My Life...Need Severe Help...

[cole]

Jenna, you have got to love yourself. Be proud of who you are. You have to have that amazing self-confidence and put that smile on your face. I struggled with this for the longest time, believe me. It hasn't been until the last couple months that I said, "You know what? I'm done being a critic of myself." There are so many people out there who will tear somebody else down in a second....that's why you've got to love yourself.

Wake up every day and say, "By God, I'm approved by Almighty God himself. He made me; he accepts me; he loves me. I love me." Pretend like you have a big stamp right across your chest that says, APPROVED BY ALMIGHTY GOD. What is that saying from that famous basketball player, who I can't remember the name of? He said, "Yeah, I like other people.....but I love me some me!"



I've learned to take time for yourself to do stuff that you enjoy doing; screw what other people say or think. Are you out to impress them? Hell no; you're out to impress you. I want you to work on that self-esteem, and that self-confidence. And why shouldn't you? You're young, you're healthy, I don't doubt that you're smart, funny....in all of your posts, I always notice how positive you always are!!

I'm still learning myself; damn, I was suicidal not too long ago, not something I like to admit. But you know what, I freaking love myself now, and it's the best feeling in the world. So love yourself, and you will see other people start to notice it as well.

 

[supercarriefan]

Jenna, unfortunately things aren't going to change in just a few days. All of the things many of us have suggested are meant to improve your situation over a period of time. Sadly, nothing will help immediately. Keep going for walks, and really try to think outside the box for volunteer opportunities. Does your community have an animal shelter, a soup kitchen, or something like that? I know my local hospital relies on volunteers to do many things. Nursing homes or special care homes are often eager to have volunteers come into spend time with their residents.
Trust me...I know it's not easy to get out there. I've struggled with this myself many times. You may be a little scared to put yourself out there, but please try even a little bit. You will reap the rewards!
As Cathie mentioned above, do you have a church that you like to attend in your area? Even just attending service can be a nice way to get out and be around people. Once you get there, you might find a volunteer opportunity that interests you.
I would love to tell you an easy fix for the way you're feeling, but I can't. Please believe all of us, Jenna, when we tell you that you can overcome this. You have so much to offer the world. Sometimes it takes a little time to really figure things out, but you will get there! You will, with time, be living the life you want to live.

 

[jaylee50]

Jenna, you don't have to sit all day. Phone a hospital and look into volunteering there. You can read patients menus to them and fill them out. Call a local church and get involved there. I know others have given this same advice, but you are harming yourself by doing nothing. Doing nothing is a decision you are making. Read books that might help to motivate you into action. See about making phone calls to shut ins who have no contact except for a daily call from someone like you. You have to begin to think outside yourself. Search for solutions rather than just focusing on problems. I don't mean to be tough on you, but you reached out to us, and we're trying to help because we care about you. Take a camera with you on your walks and look for the beauty that surrounds you. There can be beauty in a dandelion. How about a photo of a flag blowing in the breeze with a beautiful blue sky behind it, or maybe an unusual house or children at play. And take deep breaths to clear your head.
Please start thinking about SOLUTIONS.

 

[HuiZ]

thanks for all the replies guys. It really means a lot to me. As of right now things have not gotten any better. I have tried a lot of your suggestions like going for a walk and things like that but nothing seems to be working. I try really hard to think positive and be happy but I'm just not. I am at the point where I am hurting so bad. I can't take it anymore. I have even looked into joining a group or something but in my area there is not much in the way of that. I am just so sick of sitting day in and day out with nothing to do and then I just get sad and can't get rid of that feeling. I really need a solution to that but I am so scared that there just isn't one.

Give it some time, Jenna.

It doesn't change that quickly, but all those small efforts every day will gradually change your mood, your outlook on life etc. I promise. Don't give up yet.

 

[kewlie78189]

I really believe my biggest problem is that I don't really know what I want to do with my life. I have only really wanted one thing. That is to get married and have kids and be a stay at home mom. That is all I have ever really wanted. Other than that I don't have many interests in anything. People always tell me to get a job and just get over how I am feeling and to be honest I wish it was that simple. I have done many jobs and have hated most of them. I find that I was so miserable doing them. Even more than I am miserable now. I know many people tell me that that is not life and we have to do things we don't like to do. But I have had so much crap in my life I honestly just want to feel happy for once. I have tried to look for things I might be interested in but most things I am just not. I am not really good at anything. So I feel I am just stuck in this situation...I really have no idea where to go from here...

 

[Cps235]

Hey Jenna. My name is Drew. I’m sorry to hear you’re going through some personal distress at the moment. Hold On. Pain Ends. I’ve been where you been. Life is full of ups and downs but God doesn’t give us more than we cannot handle. "God put us here on this carnival ride, we close our eyes never knowing where it will take us next." I believe that even though it seems you are stuck, life will get better. Life has a funny way of taking flight and all you can do is hold on tight no matter how scary, depressing or thrilling it may be. We have to embrace the pain in order to withstand this enduring journey.
"The gem cannot be polished without friction, nor man perfected without trials." - Chinese proverb Life will get better. The ways I deal with depressing thoughts is by listening to music, write poetry, and go on daily walks and just breathe in the fresh air. It really helps a lot. It clears my mind and I am able to go on through life a little easier. The pain and the worries will always be there but it is how you deal with them seals your fate for another tomorrow. I’m always here if you need someone to talk to. I’ll be that friend you need in helping you to cope with life unending trials.
Again, I am extremely sorry that you been through a lot of pain in your life. I know how you are feeling and trust me you’re not alone. You have an amazing support system here on Carrie Fans and all we want is to see you get through this trying time. It will get better. You have to take steps in making the light shine in your life. It will not be easy trust me but you have to be motivated to let the light shine through. Love conquers all. You will see that our love on Carrie Fans will pull you through. I have faith that you will make it through this. You are strong, You are tough and most importantly, YOU ARE LOVED. Don’t be afraid to write down your thoughts in a journal or diary. Just release those emotions on paper or even through art such as painting or drawing. Find ways that will lift you up!!! Also, I know you feel alone being that your friends are away at college but try to find websites that cater to helping you better your life and self-esteem. For example. support groups, online chats, etc. I cannot stress this enough, You are not alone. Life may look grim but you got to believe that it will get better. Take steps in making sure that the darkness stays out of your life.

 

[Zman312]

Jenna,
I am so sorry to hear your situation. Please understand that Life is funny like this, "ALL the bad happens at once" but you have to fight it. THINGS WILL GET BETTER! I know it's hard to see the bright light now but keep going and you will see that it's very close.

I went through some difficult times recently but I over came it. I am still piecing things together, but at the end I know there is something better waiting for me. I hope you are doing better and my prayers will be with you!

 

[bearball49]

I feel for you. I am raising a grandaughter that will be 18 in May. She has been through all of your problems plus more that are even worse. She dropped out of school because the other kids picked on her so. She rarely leaves the sanctity of her room,only to go to therapy or walk the dogs. One thing that has helped her immensely is online forums and role playing sites where she is able to channel her hurt and anger creatively. It is real therapeautic for her and she is developing a real talent for writing as a result. Just a suggestionbut you will be in my thoughts and prayers and please remember that there are those out there that care about you and value you as a person. I do not even know you, but I watch for your posts and know you are another avid Carrie fan!

 

[PLAYON4CARRIEUNDERWOOD]

I'm new here but this is what I can tell you: Just stay "cool" and remain positive, I suffer from anxiety and depression, but knowing life is better after you climb a mountain is better than quitting. Don't worry. I used to worry a lot too.

 

[ashley]

Awww i'm sorry to hear all of this. Have you seeked to get on anti depressants? Not saying you may need them or anything but it wouldn't hurt to try them. Take some long walks around your neighborhood and find something that makes you happy. I wouldn't want to see anyone unhappy or depressed. I'm here if you need anything, or even to talk. My inbox is always open.

 

[bearball49]

thanks for all the replies guys. It really means a lot to me. As of right now things have not gotten any better. I have tried a lot of your suggestions like going for a walk and things like that but nothing seems to be working. I try really hard to think positive and be happy but I'm just not. I am at the point where I am hurting so bad. I can't take it anymore. I have even looked into joining a group or something but in my area there is not much in the way of that. I am just so sick of sitting day in and day out with nothing to do and then I just get sad and can't get rid of that feeling. I really need a solution to that but I am so scared that there just isn't one.

I really feel for you. I've spent the last 11 years raising grandkids, both of whom were abused. My granddaughter just turned 18 and on top if the physical and verbal abuse, she was molested continuously by my daughters boyfriend and no one would believe her. 3 years ago on her 15th birthday she took an entire bottle of antipsychotic medication. Because it was a newer medicine, they could only monitor her while her body rode out the effects of the medication. I came very close to losing her. She has tried it all and this year dropped out if high school as she could not deal with people. I am hoping she tries for her GED in the fall. She lives in her bedroom and rarely even joins the family. She used to attend church with us and gave that up as well. Recently, she decided to go to church with me. The following Sunday, she stayed home. Last Sunday, she told me how much better she felt about herself after going to church. She had purposey stayed home the second week to see how things went. Her life went back in crisis. She once again returned to church and for the first time in 5 years got out of her comfort zone enough to get in the car and go on a family vacation and spend time with her dad. She has got a lot of issues and the damage is so bad that she may never be right. The fact remains that she knows she is loved unconditionally by me and by her heavenly Father. All I can tell you having lived this life for many years is to take each day as it comes and try to find the beauty in each day....even if that beauty is small and only matters to you. You have us as a Carrie fan......my granddaughter is addicted to the computer writing stories where she can control the endings,charcters etc. Please don't give up...PM me any time. Trust me, I have seen this first hand and again in my granddaughter. Are there times I am overwhlmed, absolutely, but life can still be wonderful in spite of all obstacles. You are special and I know I look for your posts. Please hang in there, you must have something nice to look forward to.....are you going to one of Carrie's concerts? There are no magic answers and not even pills always help....you may be damaged, but you are special to many and you should not forget that. Do something that makes YOU happy. A dog or cat can be a real comfort. Please keep us posted as we do care.

 

[Carrie_Rocks_The_House]

I really believe my biggest problem is that I don't really know what I want to do with my life. I have only really wanted one thing. That is to get married and have kids and be a stay at home mom. That is all I have ever really wanted. Other than that I don't have many interests in anything. People always tell me to get a job and just get over how I am feeling and to be honest I wish it was that simple. I have done many jobs and have hated most of them. I find that I was so miserable doing them. Even more than I am miserable now. I know many people tell me that that is not life and we have to do things we don't like to do. But I have had so much crap in my life I honestly just want to feel happy for once. I have tried to look for things I might be interested in but most things I am just not. I am not really good at anything. So I feel I am just stuck in this situation...I really have no idea where to go from here...

Just take it day by day Jenna. I've been praying for you that you will be healed from your depression.